Thursday 21 April 2011

just my thoughts...

I think I am like the one person amongst my friends that’s got this whole life thing figured out. Or at least that’s what most people think. But truth is, I am actually far from it. A mess of ambitions and goals and dreams and achievements, always trying to make sure I make the most of my life. Always trying to do something new, to redefine the definitions and rewrite history. I’ve got a long list of achievements but they are not enough, no! Not for me. Over achievers they call them, too ambitious. They never gon get nowhere, them bitch ass haters saying. But I beg to differ.

Truth is my thoughts were once along those same lines. A dreamer they called me. I had thoughts, ideas and projects running in and out of my mind all the time. I remember once in a science class I told my lab partners I would live to disprove Bernoulli’s principle. Laughed it off, is what they did. Jokes! Is what they said. And I listened, believed them even, till I set my first dream on track. I never stopped dreaming, it’s almost like a part of me, always looking at the bigger picture, thinking beyond the outside of the box. It’s almost like the depth of the words of an Mc. Even when he is out of the booth you can tell because all his words sound like a well thought out bar. He doesn’t actually sit and think about a poetic way to state his points of view; it’s just become a part of him. Yes, that’s exactly how it is with this thing of mine. 

I see things I could change everywhere I look. Things I could change for the better. Got all these ideas n thoughts rolling in and out of my mind by the minute, pandemonium. So I get a pen n try to put them down but they are gone. Literally get headaches trying to roll these thoughts fresh off the press in my mind. So I take on the mint that actually makes it to the stand. Take them down one at a time, leave no room for defeat, and follow through till the end. Still stacking this tower of cards believing it won’t come down crashing on me. Leaving my future to fate and spinning it in that mill of uncertainty. Well of course I’ve got that fail safe plan, the original template that everyone edits to suit the different wants and ambitions. Always hoping I’ll never have to enter the combination to that fail safe. And there I go again, hoping. All I am is highly optimistic never pessimistic since attitude designs the paths that all our fates take.

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